buried treasure

Finally I had some creative jolts in this new year, and had a bit of quiet to utilize them. I've resolved to finish (one draft of) this fiction piece I've started YEARS ago, at least to have one draft completed from start to finish, this year. You would think years would make it die out, but this Lilly woman is in my head, telling me what she's going through, and so it has never totally fizzled out.

I started it with the idea of a short story, and then had my idea for who the antagonist would be, and then that changed 2 times. (I know it sounds crazy that you don't know the "who done it" of these stories from the get-go, but believe me, the characters have their own ideas about plot!) Then more characters popped in to the mix, and with the help of a community college novel writing class, an on-line fiction class, and the ever-encouraging words of my writers' group (bless them!), it's really getting going. (If one can say "getting going" over a 3 year period?) Thus, my resolution to finish the story. Then, I can edit it.

It felt like a God-nod that I got the Writers Digest issue in the mail with a cover popping with articles about inspiration and persistance for aspiring writers in 2010. I even read most of that issue instead of just filing it "for later" with all the other issues I never made time for in '09.

Anyway, as I was working on new scenes and actually living up to my resolution (well, at least not hurting it), I came across my old files of various chapters and parts from all these years of fiddling with the story. I was quite surprised and pleased to find that I had written some very good bits (sentences, merely) in parts of these old ramblings, which illuminated ideas long forgotten about the story. How cool is it to come across a "new" plot twist you'd already thought of but forgotten? Never mind the worry about early onset alzheimer's...at least I wrote it down.

Which goes to show why it's important to keep writing, and get it down on paper, even if it's awful and you hate it and you can't beleive you'd ever dare to call yourself a writer. And thankfully, we live in the age of word-processing cut and paste, making it so much easier to sort out the gems from the seaweed. Because who knows what gems you've deposited deep under the sand without a map?

sponge

I am constantly amazed at how many things Griffin can learn and how quickly he can master a new skill. For example, yesterday he decided that he could roll and (sort of) catch a ball rolling back toward him. And he put the pink square in the correct spot on his shape-sorter toy!! How does he figure these things out so quickly? Next thing he'll be speaking in full sentences and wanting his own blog!

Mostly I still can't quite believe that this wonderful little person came from Steve and me. God clearly created this little miracle, and somehow entrusted him to us. I hope we don't disappoint.

So this is why there should be two parents....

Steve's off at my family's men-folk's deer camp overnight, so I'm solo with the baby. Which is fine, really, except that I started to really freak myself out by doing things like staring at his eyes too long, and wondering why the whites of his eyes are so WHITE! And listening too carefully, until I wondered why he makes that Tarzan noise? Is that some hallmark of early voice box issues? And is that sniffle getting worse? Is it the flu?!? And why is he giving me that funny look??

The other parent is mostly there to help keep you from driving yourself insane. And to remind you that you're just worrying yourself for no reason. And to tell you that that soon that Tarzan call will be a hazy memory, so you'd best enjoy it today.

At last, Griffy's asleep. Whew! I can now focus my worry-maker on the ridiculous weather-thriller, _Ice Twisters_, on the SyFy channel. (And worry over why they ever changed their name from the proper SciFi spelling?!? What's the world coming to?)

Blowin' in the wind

Griffy has finally got fabulous hair! It's amazing that he now has grown enough of it to actually flow in the breeze.

Why is it that all of the sudden he resists napping? He's tired. He's had lunch, a bottle, play time, and he's moaning in Tarzaneze (sounds like a hoarse Tarzan call. Very funny). Yet, he refuses to go to sleep!
Please, Mommy needs a nap too--can you please get groggy? *sigh!*

Doesn't help that I've got the duty-phone the week, so I'm on call. Turns out this tough economy isn't slowing the boozing down. I got numerous blood search warrant calls in the last few nights. No sleep for me!

Ooh, is Griffin showing signs of slowing down? Was that an eye-rub I just saw?? Let's hope.

Business bouncer

I think if I invented an adult-sized bouncer (you know, the bouncy excer-saucer thing with a surrounding play-console), not only would I be in better physical shape, but I'd also be more productive. Instead of the rattles, I'd have an Ipod. Instead of the mirror, I'd have a laptop. And really, I'd get more writing done. And be 5 pounds lighter.

At least now I have an excuse!

So I started this blog back in 2006, and now it's late 2009, and I only posted once! Seems I'm pretty pathetic. My old blog theme was to do with follow-through. Clearly not my forte.
However, at least now I'm a parent of a 10 month old child, so I have a built-in reason for my lack of follow-through.

Why am I bothering to try blogging again? Because I beleive in Samuel Beckett: "Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better." And because I dare to think I have something to say worth sharing.

Today as I dropped my son off at daycare, sans hat, sans gloves, sans coat, I wondered whether, since I'm not a "full-time mom" (yet another phrase for a stay-at-home mom), am I merely a "part-time mom"? I hope not. Then again, look who forgot winterwear when it was 30 degrees out this morning...

Why is it so tough?

Why do we fight with ourselves on our most basic goals? Why can't I keep the dishes done, the laundry from piling up, the dog's hair from matting, my mail from camoflaging my dining room table?